ESPN Finds Excuse To List Bill Belichick Less Than No. 1, Ranks Playing Careers Of NFL Coaches
By Matt Dolloff, CBS Boston
BOSTON (CBS) -- ESPN found a way for Jack Del Rio to be No. 1 on a list of NFL coaches. That's all that really needs to be said here.
Ranking Bill Belichick at 29th out of the 32 head coaches by any criteria probably had everyone at the editorial meeting pants-less. It's literally the only way to rank NFL coaches without predictably cementing Belichick at No. 1, where he's held onto the spot for nearly two decades and will until he's done coaching.
All due respect to Kevin Seifert, his ranking of the greatest playing careers of NFL coaches is a blatant click-bait list. It's not Seifert's fault that so many unsuspecting page-viewers will take this initially as a straight-up ranking of coaches, but there's zero chance ESPN didn't know what they were doing here. Seifert did his best not to make ESPN look like trolls but ultimately we're going to see right through this like Belichick pierces souls with his laser-beam eyes.
Ultimately, the highlight of the list is the old college photos of all the coaches. Like John Fox looking like he just lit up under the bleachers at San Diego State...
...Or Pete Carroll doing the Charleston:
But I DARE you to find anything bad to say about the photo they used for Belichick. One word: Stud.
Belichick, who lettered in football and lacrosse and squash at Wesleyan University, played offensive lineman and tight end. As a Division III player he was inevitably going to be ranked low on the list. He's No. 29, just behind ... Rex Ryan. Tell me that wasn't the #content equivalent of taking a cattle prod to the collective kidneys of New Englanders everywhere.
In all seriousness, congrats to Oakland Raiders head coach Jack Del Rio, who might be the king of does-just-enough-to-keep-having-a-job head coaches but played 11 seasons as a linebacker and made the Pro Bowl in 1994. But this is the only way he would ever top any list of NFL coaches.
Let the trolling begin! Here's Bills beat writer Mike Rodak showing how to expertly troll Patriots Nation. The ol' "Omit the important detail and play dumb if called out for trolling" trick. Textbook.
Matt Dolloff is a writer for CBSBostonSports.com. His opinions do not necessarily reflect that of CBS or 98.5 The Sports Hub. Have a news tip or comment for Matt? Follow him on Twitter @mattdolloff and email him at mdolloff@985thesportshub.com.
